Who Said I Was Cranky?

I've read that INTJs are known to forget to eat. I believe that. I just don't think it should be assumed that forgetting means the INTJ is not hungry, suffering from low blood sugar, or generally rabid. The INTJ may not know that the true reason for their irritability is hunger, they may believe it has more to do with the world conspiring against them and other people being total idiots, but in my experience, a granola bar goes a long way toward fixing the disconnect.

I am particular about my personal comfort. If I am too hot, or too cold, or too anything, I will be irritable. And by irritable I mean a complete and total Medusa with snake hair and all. I will not necessarily acknowledge that my discomfort, how ever mild Mr. Poppins is apt to believe it is, caused my irritability. This is because I will not only be irritable but irrational. I like to mix my ire when I can, which is often. So, being irrational, but completely convinced that I am the most rational person on the planet, I will become intolerant and intolerable.

I like to mix my intolerances, too.

Right now I am sick. Foggy, achy throat, heavy limb-type sick. I don't like it. Forget the fact that the house is at the perfect temperature (that would be 73 degrees and not 72 or 74). Forget the fact that I just had some soup and a little theraflu. Forget the fact that Secret Lulu is being an angel.

I don't feel well.

Nothing else matters. Human interaction is an irritation. Breathing is more than I should have to do. I just want to be left alone. Entirely alone. So alone that even I'm not in the room.

Seriously. I'm not very good company right now. I shouldn't have to feel this sick and spend time with some self-pitying jerkwad.

Does anyone know how to self-induce a temporary coma? Scratch that, I'd probably get brain damage. I'm not that desperate yet, but I'll let you know if I change my mind.

Here's a secret: INTJs are not always rational. Don't tell any of the other INTJs that I told you. Mostly because they'll deny it and then they'll burn me at the stake as a heretic even though I'm telling the truth. That happened to Galileo and, yes, I'm aware that my assertion of irrationality is not exactly on par with Galileo declaring the earth is not the center of the universe but this is literary license, people. Work with me.

I think it is time to draw a distinction between the ability to rationalize and thinking rationally. I can rationalize anything--any time and any where--regardless of what stress I may be feeling. I can rationalize while in the middle of transition labor. I mean really, wouldn't it be best for all involved, wouldn't I be that much more focused on the task at hand, if I could just pause the contractions and get a little nap?

Miracle no happen.

I can also figure out why any disagreement or misunderstanding we have is your fault. All your fault. Really, you should apologize now. Right now.

Rational is all logic and facts, but rationalized is propaganda and spin. The first is true, the second just sounds true. Not the same thing. Not even a little bit.

So what if INTJs don't come out and stomp their feet or wring their hands when they're upset. That doesn't mean that we're remaining rational. Oh, no. Don't be fooled. Look closely. Really closely. Because even though we may appear rational, and we may even sound rational, we are really systematically rearranging the laws of the universe to underscore how irrational you are in the face of our long-suffering logic.

Just because it looks like a duck and quacks like a duck, folks, doesn't mean it's a duck. It could just be a really clever goose. Or an animatronic toy.

You pick.

And maybe, just maybe, it is a duck. Maybe, the INTJ is still rational and logical and all of those clear-headed, cool-blooded things INTJs pride themselves on. It's possible. Don't get me wrong. Most of the time it's even likely.

But it's not guaranteed. Because if the INTJ is hungry, tired, sick, or in any way physically uncomfortable or overwhelmed, you might not be a bonafide idiot. Of course, if you don't walk away quickly, you are definitely an idiot because that INTJ is likely to take off your arm, beat you over the head with it, and then try to convince you that not only did you deserve it but it was actually a favor.

So anyway, long story short, I owe Mr. Poppins an apology.

Comments

[Liz]

Somehow I get a pretty strong feeling that Mr Poppins thinks your damn cute, no matter how much of a not-duck your being.

I like Cadbury Eggs a whole lot - and so does Bookgirl because she wrote so and so does The Dol because she wrote so. You know what else I really like, speaking of Easter candy? The Easter Sweettarts. The chicks and ducks and bunnies - there is something about those particular shapes that makes them SO much better than the rest. Anyway, you said Cadbury eggs and then something about ducks and this is where my mind goes.....

[Liz]

And another thing: People, am I the only one who wants to talk about the Do Step In Time links? My cat is a happy slob. I would never, and I do mean NEVER smear litter box crumbs or whatever all over the floor. Except for if I was a cat.

And my prayer is right on. Wait, what?

[Diosa]

Polly, I'm almost never irrational and I practically never forget to eat. And I'm not apologizing to MY husband for the words we had yesterday. I was completely rational and correct.

[Polly Poppins]

Liz, my prayer and cat type are dead on for INTJ but not for INFJ, which is how I know that if I have to fall on one side of the line or the other, it's INTJ for me.

Diosa, yeah, I'm sure it was all Blackstone's fault.

[Ramblin' Jack]

Apology accepted. You know I can never stay mad at you (for long).

[SJ]

"So alone that even I'm not in the room."

I just know I'll wake up in the middle of the night laughing about that one. Boy, do I know *that* feeling.

Umm, yeah, decided to de-lurk today. Any day now, I'll decide to find out what all this "type" business is. Because ... huh?

[Polly Poppins]

SJ, you sound like and ENTP to me. But that's a completely unsubstantiated guess. Let me know if I'm right, though. If you get around to finding out, that is.