Twilight, the Movie

I am freaking in love with this movie. I just can't help it. I know it's not what you, she, and her thought it would be. I know you can't stand Bella because, like, you're jealous. I know that you had this perfect idea of how everyone would be and it wasn't exactly like that but c'mon, people, this movie is my favorite.

I can't help it.

The Model claims that the people responsible should be charged with criminal negligence. She may have a point. Somewhere in the real world someone might be able to prove that in a court of law but as for me and my house, we will be going to see that movie again.

And maybe again.

I haven't gotten that far in the plan yet.

Anyway, the thing is that Edward, who is Rob Pattinson in real life, sings a couple of songs for the sound track and they totally slay me. I haven't been so head-over-heels in love with a new artist since sometime back in 1994. Also, the rest of the sound track is ridiculously killer.

So there's that.

And the whole thing was barely held together. I get that. It was a movie for people who read the book. I kind of think of the Harry Potter movies that way, too. I mean, sheesh, while reading about night after night of snuggling and coming out of class only to find Edward waiting for me--ummmm, I meant to type Bella--is compelling enough reading, it's not exactly big screen magic.

I could have done with more sex. I said that about the book and I'll say it again about the movie. More sex was in order. But at least there was a serious kissing scene in the movie and I, for one, was convinced that Bella came within thirty seconds of throwing her virginity to the vampires. Not everyone I attended the movie with was feeling the chemistry of undying love the way they had hoped, but I was at least feeling the give-hell-a-run-for-its-money, scorching lust of a couple of way-too-hott-and-bothered seventeen-year-olds.

So, again, more that.

I'm sure that going into the movie with, ahem, adjusted expectations didn't hurt but, all in all, I have to say that my biggest problem with the movie was, much like the original book, production value. There was something off about the sound, you know, like it was television quality or maybe it was that I could hear the "quiet on the set" silence beneath the dialogue.

I got used to it.

Also, there were times when the scenes were a little unevenly paced, but I chalked that up to some scenes were requirements and could not be skimped on and other scenes were not-so-much and so that kind of dictated a bit there. I mean, I would have sat through a four hour movie, gladly, but I just don't think that's done anymore. Maybe they should have made it a mini-series, kind of like how Stephen King had to go back and remake The Shining to get it all in because sometimes two hours just wasn't enough.

Whatever.

The thing is that even when this movie was off for me, and there were plenty of times it was:

• Jasper had an Edward Scissorhands thing going on
• Overall the hair on the male vampires was just way too sculpture
• Alice was supposed to have a Winona Ryder circa 1993 thing going on with the pixie hair
• Rosalie should have been played by Scarlett Johansson
• Kate Winslet was Esme, there's no way around it
• Charlie was supposed to look like the sheriff from Eureka
• Edward was more emotional than I would have imagined

...didn't matter. I got past it. Because I know how to suspend disbelief. I'm really good at it.

Long story short, I freaking loved this movie.

And it broke my heart. Because I'm never going to be seventeen again, people. I know that as a thirty-three-year-old adult hobbit, this just shouldn't be news. Yet it is news. Unwelcome news. Downright disappointing, nasty, almost-as-bad-as herpes news. Because as much as being seventeen sucked hardcore,

well,

there was that.

 

Comments

[court]

well you heard my comments.
i didn't hate it, but by no means did i love it.
i'm waiting for the dvd so i can rent it.
or maybe i need to give the movie a far shot
or maybe my nose ring is just harboring bitterness like the dol says.
and i'm still not completely sure of what this bitterness that i'm harboring is.....

i'll give it this: robert pattison can sing and he's melted my heart along with conor oberst.

[Diosa]

I did like the movie, but not nearly as much as I loved the book. But that's usually to be expected. It will probably be a classic for me though, much like Say Anything.

[enfp]

I didn't read this post, because I haven't seen the movie....
But I am wondering...
Are the books better? Aren't the books always better? Should I be reading them first?

[The Dol]

Yep, I liked the movie, too. I actually didn't notice the sound so much as I thought the direction and editing were off. Sometimes the actor's over-acted, or we had to look at a pained expression for a little too long, that sort of thing. But I thought that mostly, it was what I expected. And wasn't Jacob perfectly cast? I can't wait to see how they beef him up later.

[Alice]

How did I not even notice that the movie was out?

I'm glad you liked it, Poppins.

[Alice]

Lets go, Poppins, lets go

[Polly Poppins]

yeah, yeah, alice: pot meet kettle.