The Model is a Dime a Dozen

So, the other day, I went out to lunch with Rex and El Spawn Numero Dos. We went to one of those little bread-themed places--like your Paneras and what have you--and sat outside on the patio. 

That's when it hit us: the foul stench of cheap perfume. 

We had sat down next to a table containing this girl-woman, I'd guess she was 24-ish, and her two male friends. She was a tall brunette--probably my height--with an okay face and terrible skin, maybe slightly on the chubby side, and definitely dressed up. Heels and tight clothes.

But really the best way I can describe her is that she looked cheap. The guys were sort of nondescript douchebags.

If people-watching were an Olympic sport, I'd be on the U.S. team, so of course I was eavesdropping on their conversation.

She was describing this choice she had to make. Someone--I don't know who, I obviously missed that part of the conversation--had told her that he would either buy her any car of her choice, or take her and her friends on any vacation of her choice, all expenses paid.

She pointed out that she would still have to pay the registration, which in Arizona is a percentage of the car's value, I think, and insurance on the car. So she couldn't go crazy and get a Lamborghini or something. She was thinking maybe a BMW 5-series--as opposed to her current Dodge Charger. 

If she chose the vacation, she'd have to be careful in choosing which friends to take because she wouldn't want anyone to feel left out but she also wouldn't want to ask if she could take a giant group of people.

I was guessing that maybe the man in question was a relative, like maybe her father or rich uncle or something. And maybe she had met some milestone like graduating from college and this was her present. But then she told her friends that her benefactor was not expecting sex in return. Which is a claim I find doubtful. Even her douchebag friends suggested a little sex was the least she could do in return for something that could cost $100,000 or more.

Rex thought this was pretty crazy. "Who does that?" he wondered. Lots of people, I told him. People, particularly people with oodles of money, have all sorts of strange arrangements. We decided there must be some kind of really filthy, degrading, kinky sex involved.

So Polly called me later, and I told her about the whole thing. She was, of course, not at all surprised. But she disagreed about the kinky sex, and said it's probably not even anything more than your vanilla standard fare.

When people ask me about the fashion industry, I am generally not all that kind about it.

Models actually have kind of a tough gig. The industry is not at all regulated, and models are not always treated well. There is no model's union. Nor is it as lucrative a game as most people think, unless you're a supermodel. And there are hardly any supermodels anymore. Whether you get hired is almost entirely out of your control. Either you happened to be born with the look that is "in" this season or not. And you're entirely replaceable.

There's one thing I always say about it, and that is: Pretty girls are a dime a dozen.

For this reason, Polly says I undervalue pretty. She says that having spent a lot of my life as a pretty person among many other pretty people who truly are a dime a dozen, I don't appreciate the real benefits and value of pretty among the general population. 

Being a smart person among smart people can have the same effect. If you're a smart person who is just comparing yourself to a bunch of geniuses, it can make you forget how smart you really are compared to the plebs.

I'm having a bit of that same experience right now as a pseudo-hipster among the very, very hip and stylish people of Rex's tribe. Seriously. We went to a boutique opening the other night and there was a musical performance with one person playing an accordion and singing and doing some sort of percussion with his feet. And another person playing a saw. It was tres avant garde, and I was definitely not worthy.

But I digress.

Polly suggested that when I became single again I could have found an arrangement that was similar to or better than the one that awful girl was getting, if I'd only tried. 

Silly me, I had to go and get into a relationship for love, of all things. 

But she's probably right. There are plenty of people out there with more money than they know what to do with, having a difficult time finding someone worthy of spending it on.

So, ladies and gentlemen, my question to you is this: any car you want, or any vacation you want--what would you choose?

I'm thinking Maserati. Four-door, of course. Because I'm practical that way.

Comments

[Polly Poppins]

Definitely have to go with the car. Vacations don't last for more than a couple of weeks and then all you have are pictures.

[Pandora]

With all this cramming for finals, roommate & slight Male Pandora stress, I want a vacation. Did you know that "stress" isn't even a word in the Tahitian language? But I don't want to go to there. I'm thinking Greece. But, only if there's a boy and a vespa.

[Pangaia]

Car, for sure. But I have no idea which kind.

[The Model]

Poll, that's exactly what I'm saying. The car is something you can keep and make use of for years. And if you're down on your luck or decide you really want a vacation instead, you can sell it. Vacations are so fleeting though.

On the other hand, my general philosophy is to value experiences over objects, so if it was a really spectacular, mind-altering trip (like to spend a whole year traveling all over the globe or something), I might have to go with that. But that doesn't really fall under the heading of "vacation," I don't think.

[Diosa]

I'm perfectly happy with a non-luxury vehicle that I don't have to worry about having the parts stolen off of, so vacation all the way. I'm thinking two weeks, all expenses paid to Greece. A nice tour of the islands, fabulous food, beaches, just me and my closest two dozen friends.

[Alice]

If I could drive any car, I'd drive the one I already have. Seriously, I'm so going with the vacation.

Boy oh boy could I use a vacation right now.
I'd go to St John most likely, and I'd go alone (sorry, friends, vacation is not a vacation if I have to deal with other people). I would sit on the beach for as many weeks as possible - I'm thinking between 3 and 5. I'd drink myself silly, I'd find dance clubs, I'd listen to island music and country music and obsess over getting sun tanned. I'd sleep. Good Lord, I'd sleep.

[Matty]

This is really a tough choice. On one hand a car burns gas, which makes me feel guilty. On the other hand a vacation mean a jet, which burns a lot of gas. Then again getting a car helps keep people employed, but on the last vacation I went to we passed by the slums on our way to a very swanky resort and I ended up giving out $1,000 in tips at an all inclusive resort out of guilt. If I choose a vacation and have no girl to go with that would be a bummer. Unless I went to one of those hedonism resorts...but that is kind of gross. If I get a hot car I could probably get a hot woman to ride around in it. Then again with a hot woman in a beautiful car gas will not be the only thing I burn through. Wait a minute...do I have to have sex with some creepy old man to get this choice? Forget it this is making my brain hurt! By the way a lot of beautiful people are oblivious to their hotness...I know I am.

[The Dol]

See, I was wondering what Matty was wondering: Do I have to have creepy sex with some morally bankrupt rich dude?

In any case, I'm going with the vacation. I like my little hybrid vehicle just fine. I don't know where I would go, but it wouldn't involve hiking around to museums or historical sites or anything like that. It could either be a snowy wonderland where I might take a skiing lesson and then drink cocoa by a roaring fire, then go make some snow angels, or it would be the traditional tropical paradise type of thing. I live in San Diego and it's almost Christmas, so I'm really liking the snowy wonderland thing right now.

And Model, as silly as it may sound, you are way more than the dime-a-dozen pretty girl, because you're smart and you can write, in addition to your general awesomeness. Pretty and stupid, now *that's* humdrum.

[Polly]

Okay, when given the choice, initially, I assumed I was answering it as the girl would and assuming that, as the girl, I'd be driving a 1988 fiat or something that clearly was on its last leg, so I chose the car. But I don't actually want a new car.

So if someone were to say, pay off the entire cost of my current car, I'd still choose the car. But if I already have a car that's completely paid off and in great condition, then I'd totally vacation at some exclusive spa in a warm, sunny place with lovely little umbrellas in all the drinks.

[The Model]

Diosa and Alice, your vacation ideas certainly do sound appealing.

Matty, your comment made me LOL in the literal sense.

Dol, you totally made me blush.

Polly, that's sort of what I was thinking. I was assuming I was in that girl's position, not my own current one. I probably should have written than into the question. But even in my current position, I'd take the nice car. And drive it every day for years. If I could take a vacation for that long, it'd be a different story.

[Bookgirl]

I'm all about the vacation. I drive a '99 Jetta that's starting to self-destruct, but I live in the city and park on the street. If I got my dream car (a Mercedes convertible, in case you're wondering), I'd have to pay for a spot (currently $225 a month in my building) or it would be gone in 2 days.

So vacation it is, to somewhere warm and beachy, where the demon alcohol runs from the faucets.

As for the dime a dozen thing, it's true. I spent most of my life being the smart girl. Until I started working in Publishing, and became pretty average. And for most of my life I would have traded in the smarts in a heartbeat to be pretty. I think whatever you've got feels commonplace when everyone around you has it too.